08.05.2021

Vagina-infused beers finally available to purchase, here’s the… down-low

If you’re like me, you probably often catch yourself in deep thought wondering why beer infused with the vaginal lactic acid of Polish underwear models isn’t more of thing. I mean, come on beer industry. We can have $20,000 Dead Squirrel Beers, but beer made from a model’s no-no square is too taboo?

It’s 2018, get with the program. The fine folks at The Order brewery certainly have.

Deciding it was finally time to grace the world with vagina-infused beer, the Warsaw-based brewery crafted ‘The Order of Yoni’ which is brewed with the vaginal lactic acid of underwear models.

A statement on their website reads:

The secret of the beer lies in her vagina. Using hi-tech of microbiology, we isolate, examine and prepare lactic acid bacteria from vagina of a unique woman. The bacteria, lactobacillus, transfer woman’s features, allure, grace, glamour, and her instincts into beers and other products, turning them into dance with lovely goddess.

Each beer comes with a peel away label that reveals not only which model’s hoo-ha was used to make your brew, but a recommendation for which sex position you should engage in while drinking the beer.

Because if you’re not having sex with drinking a vagina-beer, what are you even doing?

As of now, there are two models who donate their moist juice (yep, you gagged) for drinkers to enjoy. This lovely babe is Paulina.

And this is Monika. The Order of Yoni brewers promise more models are coming very soon, so if you’re more of a blonde-drinker and less of a sour drinker – hold tight.

“Imagine the woman of your dreams, your object of desire. Her charm, her sensuality, her passion,” teases the brewery’s website. “Now you can try how she tastes, feel her smell, hear her voice.

Now imagine her giving you a passionate massage and gently whispering anything you’d like to hear,” the site adds. “Now free your fantasies and imagine all of that can be encompassed in a bottle of beer.

If you want more information on just what the hell is going on here, you can check out more on their website right HERE.

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