Gestures, facial expressions
About unconscious manifestations of sympathy written thousands of books, and even those who never held them in their hands, probably know the classic examples of posture protection or feminine little things like shooting with your eyes. Therefore, if you are interested in a neighbor, colleague or brother of your girlfriend and you really want to know if interest is inter- esting, you can distract yourself from his wondrous eyes and pay attention to the body. “There is such an anecdote. Two Frenchwomen are talking: it’s a shame that short men’s suits were out of fashion for men – it was once clear how a man treated you, – psychologist Rimma Efimkin jokes. –
A man, if he likes a woman, there are certain bodily reactions, and he begins to behave like a male who wants to seduce a female. “
If you take out a very ambiguous reaction from an anecdote, the man can unconsciously demonstrate the genital area, thrusting his thumbs into the back pockets of his trousers. Pretty masculine boasting is another way to show off and a sign that you are not indifferent. He will certainly find a way to brag about his status, says Rimma Efimkina, “get a purse and count the money, or they will accidentally fall out of his pocket.” Fortunately, if there is a car available: at least one can lean on it and appear in front of the chosen one in a favorable light, or tell about plans for the future – to tell what car he wants to buy instead of this “old lady”.
Take me off if you can
Particular fears are caused by the so-called “men-who-need-only-sex” – where is the guarantee that your angel is claiming a serious relationship? “A girl can be liked externally, and can be of interest as a person. And it’s understandable that these are different types of sympathy. If you are asked questions solely about social status or there is a flow of compliments about appearance, but there are no questions suggesting a detailed answer, there is no question of interest to you as an individual, “says Natalia Gulina from the Insight clinic.
Special attention, according to Rimma Yefimkina, should be given to the man’s wandering gaze: “If a woman likes and the intentions of a man are not limited to sexual relations only – he looks into the eyes longer than is considered decent, and if he likes him only as a sexual object – he will look at the lips and look at the chest.
And in that, and in another case, a woman likes sexually, but a man with serious intentions looks into the eyes, and with a frivolous – at everything below. “
Short-term relations for the sake of sport interest are indicated by too rapid penetration into personal space: “In our culture, touch requires a prior rapprochement. Pikaper begins to touch his arms and shoulders immediately, at the first meeting, “continues Ms. Gulina. According to her, for them it is generally characteristic to go straight ahead, build a certain system of relationships, as if they had already taken place. Emotional pressure, thus, drags the girl into a relationship in which she does not play any role. Ilya Matorin, who represents the “Russian model of effective seduction in Novosibirsk”, disagrees with her: “It is more a myth – it is possible to influence the interlocutor at negotiations if he hesitates to” squeeze “him. But that the girl did not have a desire, and then she went after the guy, as hypnotized – this is not. Many associate a pickup with NLP and manipulation. Unfortunately, or fortunately, this is not so. ” Nevertheless, all experts agree on one thing: a high rate of building interaction is a sign of unhealthy relationships.
And what about the soul?
Peculiarities of the perception of women, which appeared due to evolution, allow to divide the relationship into emotional and sexual. Seeing the great demand for the sexual component, the woman is all looking for someone who will be interested in her inner world. Men, according to psychologists, do not spend time on division. “There is no such thing that a man was only interested in the soul – nature gave him the function to increase the number of species, it is good for adaptation and evolution. A woman needs to raise a child, her task is to preserve, “recalls Rimma Efimkina. In any case, the presence of interest on the part of men to your values and preferences in different matters is a good sign.
“The most important need for a man is sex, and for a woman – tenderness and care, the second need is to be heard, continues Rimma Efimkina. Therefore, an attentive listener, capable of understanding your feelings and thoughts, acquires a special status.
According to Ilya Matorin, the need of a woman does not differ from the need of a man, the problem is only in stereotypes: “Everyone wants a relaxed, confident and cheerful guy, but everyone is afraid of pick-ups. Women also want sex, but there is a fundamental contradiction between women’s nature and what society is imposing on her, “complains the experienced pickup artist.
Time went out
Read by eyes and lips is appropriate at the beginning of dating. What if you meet for six months, and the man “is not ready” to talk about your relationship? In this case, it is worth asking yourself, what did you interest the young man, and look no longer at postures, but at behavior. If a man does not observe any agreements, disappears without warning and does not show activity regarding plans for the evening (“if you want – we’ll meet, you do not want – then another time”), you have to admit that you do not interest him.
“If you meet for a long time, and questions about your interests, classes do not arrive – this is a signal that he has several girls and he simply organizes himself a pleasant pastime. Do not you – so different,
Natalia Gulina cuts the line. “But at the same time one must understand that a young woman can be necessary only for a pleasant pastime, if it suits her, that’s her right.” If you want to see your relationships different, it’s worthwhile to put the question squarely and not be chimed-the earlier, the better.
However, all these reflections on the topic “likes – does not like” often happen only from the fear of admit to myself that the prospects are not as rosy as we would like. “A woman always knows the answer, but is afraid to admit it. Our women are taught to be dependent, in the end they always wait for a response from a man, even if they themselves understand everything, “explained Gulina.
Play indifference, guess in his gestures of interest, and in neutral phrases – deep feelings – all this is quite entertaining. The main thing is not to get carried away enough to stop to be aware of what is happening.