30.10.2020

No one will marry

Men consider female inability to cook as a sign of more serious problems

Almost 37% of the readers who answered the question “Do you know how to cook?” Prepare dishes of any complexity. A little more – 43% – cope with ordinary dishes. They are able to cook, but are not capable of culinary feats, about 10%. And, finally, 10% of the readers do not know how to cook. And 4% of them are thinking about learning, and almost 6% hate this business in principle. For some girls, the inability to fry eggs – something like domestic feminism, part of the image of a business woman free of conventions, and a kind of protest against grandmother’s notations “no one will marry such.” The correspondent of SHE found out how important for men is the female ability to cook – and heard the unexpected. 

Especially dangerous
Not more than a quarter – out of fifteen men – interviewed by SHE correspondent, they consider the ability of a woman to cook completely unimportant. “I can do it myself,” this minority shrugs. Most of them say that the ability to cook is an important quality of a potential woman. The most amazing thing is that they immediately stipulate that it’s not a matter of fear of hunger and not of wanting to have a nice cook at home! The fact is that contempt for cooking seems to them a very alarming signal. 

“The question is not how much a woman is skilled – she does not have to cook as a chef,” argues Vladislav, a journalist (34 years). “But if she does not try to learn at the serious, family stage of the relationship, it means that she does not care what happens in the house.

It’s not so much practical as a psychological moment – a certain indicator of personality. ” 

“If a girl does not know how to cook and cook deliciously, then she has other virtues,” says Anatoly, an engineer (28 years old). “But the girl who managed to burn the pasta to the coals, for me, ceased to exist as a potential interest. This characterizes the degree of infantilism and razdolbaystva rights – regardless of sex. ” 

“It’s a bad sign … This shows that people generally do not have enough on matters that are connected with patience,” notes Anton, a lawyer (28 years old). “And patience in family life is very important.” 

“I’m just annoyed when an adult woman declares her inability to cook with such complacency, as if this is in itself a sign of intelligence and success,” says Igor, a programmer (30 years).

For many men, the kitchen vanity – without any pragmatics – just seems to be a traditional attribute of femininity – like long hair or light defenselessness. A woman who despises cooking is, as it were, “not exactly a woman.” “Something’s not right!” The inner voice signals. 

Kinder, Küche, Kirche
So the society still – like 50, and 500 years ago – places the woman on the role of the keeper of the hearth – and the soup cooking on the hearth. True, over the years, the woman has added work in addition to the hearth. “What the press calls” business ladies “is a very real social role that has appeared in recent years,” commented sociologist Nadezhda Vavilina. – Women really began to play a more active role in economic processes. And therefore objectively they have less time for household chores.

Modern young women have more rational pragmatic thinking than previous generations. 

And they believe that it is quite logical to redistribute kitchen duties taking into account that they work on a par with men. Five years ago we conducted a survey – it turned out that 40% of women active in production, business and so on, tend to redistribute responsibilities at home, shifting part of the homework to her husband. Perhaps now there are more of them. ” Probable conflict lies in the fact that men to the idea of ​​equal duties not only in the office, but also at home come slower. 

“I think that men are more conservative than women,” Mrs. Vavilina explains.

Judging by the survey carried out by the correspondent of SHE, men are not averse to sharing responsibilities in the kitchen – if the key word is “to divide”. 

“I’m not too fond of cooking soups, it’s more like a woman’s dish,” Vladislav, a journalist, quickly formulates the recipe for family happiness. “But I cook delicious meat.” And my wife specializes in soups. “

In the end, almost every man who has seen at least one eye of bachelor life knows how to not only turn on the kettle. Moreover, there is a belief that men generally cook more delicious. As an argument usually given chefs – ladies among them are rare. However, the head of the company “East yard” Valery Bogdanov explains that this is not due to the difference in taste and scent, but because the chef combines culinary talent with tough managerial qualities.

Well, the simplest and most plausible explanation of those very male successes in the kitchen at home – which do not cease to surprise us pleasantly, – is found in the “Russian cuisine in exile” Weill and Genis: for a man, cooking is not routine and not duty. For a woman, borscht, – complain authors, – is a symbol of age-old slavery, and she cooks it, mourning her scolded childhood, lost youth, untimely old age … A man approaches a borscht as an amateur, as an amateur. The amateur has a creative interest in someone else’s business. ” 

Home reading
Perhaps, to shake off the offensive accusations of “age-old slavery” can only restore their inspiration and the very “creative interest”. One can draw inspiration from the famous fact: today the “cook” is not a boring fat man in the kitchen, but a real pop star. Suffice it to recall Julia Vysotskaya – after all, we love her not for the film “Gloss”, but for the excitement with which she rushes with a frying pan on the TV screen. Finally SHE chooses the best books that will help the inexperienced to take the first steps towards the plate, and the experienced ones will inspire new feats: 

• Peter Weil and Alexander Genis: “Russian cuisine in exile”.Witty essays in which food is an occasion to talk about the national character – and a powerful joy of life in itself. Bonus – simple recipes for recipes (from charlotte to curative and fragrant chicken broth) with small but principled subtleties of performance. 
• Jamie Oliver: “Happy days with a naked chef”, etc. A cute and terribly fashionable British chef and TV presenter is famous for the combination of the free artist’s eccentricity in baking fish in the newspaper – and the availability of prescriptions. 
• William Pohlebkin: “Cookery”, etc.The Soviet guru does not flirt with the reader, like modern pop stars in his culinary books. But he explains the very “physics” of culinary business, the properties of products and their relationships. Most often it is about how to make delicious simple dishes described by “Stolovskim” words “soup”, “second” and almost “compote”. More than in Pokhlebkin, about herbs-flavorings and nowhere to be found. Unlike modern cookbooks, Pokhlebkin does not drive you to look at the supermarket for a salmon marinade for the night. But, having studied it, you, probably, easily understand, than to replace the overseas drink.

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