Signs to look out for: cutting a queue, stealing office supplies, disobeying traffic rules, and breaking multiple appointments. And, above all, they will feel pride in it, and don’t care if their behaviour is affecting society or others in any way.
10. Constantly putting others down
Their gratitude and superiority come from putting others down constantly, making jokes or comments to make you feel embarrassed or inferior. Consider if there have been any changes in your personality – your confidence has slipped, you don’t think you deserve anything good – as these thoughts and feelings are likely a result of the narcissist putting you down.
11. Gaslighting is their go-to
One of the most common traits of a narcissist is convincing others to doubt their own instincts or sanity. They will deflect responsibility and invalidate your feelings on a subject by making you doubt your own memories and thoughts by denying that they have value or ever occurred.
This is emotional abuse, and can be really hard to identify because of its manipulative nature.
12. Lack of long-term friendships
Of course, there might be a number of reasons why a friend or partner may not have any (or many) long-term relationships. But, it is something worth looking out for.
The reason for this is a narcissist may not see the point in maintaining friendships once they feel they have served their own needs, or perhaps they are too pre-occupied with their own self image and are worried about how said friend(s) might damage it.
Other FAQs about narcissistic behaviour
GLAMOUR asked psychotherapist and executive coach Desiree Silverstone to answer our burning questions about
Can a narcissist love?
“It is possible for a narcissist to love someone else, but it will likely be different than how other people experience love,” Silverstone says.
«They tend to think of love in terms of possession—they want to «own» their partner, or at least be admired by them. This isn’t exactly an equal relationship based on trust and mutual respect. A narcissist’s love can often be conditional; if their partner does not meet their standards, the narcissist may become cold and distant. »
What attracts someone to a narcissist?
“At first glance narcissists may appear confident and self-assured, which can be appealing qualities when looking for a partner or friend,” Silverstone explains. «They also tend to have an air of superiority that makes them seem like they could understand your problems better than anyone else around you – even if this is far from true in reality.
“This feeling of being understood is something many people crave. ”
She adds: “Narcissists will use their charm, wit, and charm to get people to do what they want without any resistance or questioning. ”
Does a narcissist know they are hurting you?
This one is complicated – and experts disagree on the answer.
“Some argue that narcissists are aware of their damaging behaviours but choose not to care as long as it gets them what they want in the end – ultimately their selfishness overrides any feelings of guilt or remorse for how it affects others,” Silverstone says.
“Or, it is possible that some narcissists are conscious of their behaviour and do have feelings of guilt or remorse over how they act, but often this awareness is so deeply buried under the surface that it’s impossible to tell. ”
