The topic of manifesting has become one of the hottest conversations in wellness, and to be honest, it’s not surprising. The positive thinking technique touted by A-listers including Oprah, Lady Gaga and Lizzo is essentially the practice of focusing on aspirational thinking, with the intention of making those goals a reality.
So it’s unsurprising that Google reported a 400% increase in the number of people searching for the term last August. The idea that we are powerful enough able to attract exactly what we want into our lives? It’s a no-brainer.
But as simple as it sounds, not everyone finds manifesting easy – altering your thought patterns takes time and commitment. And let’s be real, if we’re committed to achieving our dreams via manifesting, we want to see some results. So we spoke to manifesting expert Becki Rabin, author of You Are Powerful: The Secret to Everyday Manifestation, for her advice on how to manifest properly, and the common mistakes people make when doing so.
“Manifesting isn’t this spiritual, sacred secret only available to a special few – everyone is powerful enough to create their own reality; in fact, we are all always manifesting our reality,” Becki says. “But there are some fundamental mistakes that people make when setting off on their manifesting journey that might be stopping their manifestations from becoming a reality”.
So, if you have declared what you want to the world, but it still isn’t here, here are Becki’s 8 ways you might be blocking your manifestations – and what to do about it…
You haven’t been clear about what you want
Might sound silly, but do you know what it Is that you want? Like really know. Many people when starting their manifesting journey of course want ‘better’ or ‘more’ but when asked what it really is that they want, they can’t answer. If you do not know what you want, how can you expect the universe to know? How can you take action that is aligned with your desires? How can you go out there and get it?
The fix: Be specific and get super clear on what it really is that you want! Saying that you want a relationship isn’t enough, what kind of relationship do you want? How do you want to feel in that relationship? What things do you do in that relationship? If you ask for just a relationship and don’t specify, the universe might send you a crappy one! You want jam on toast with a side order of mushrooms, you are going to make sure you ask the waiter for the mushrooms right? You gotta be as specific with your desires so that the waiter can deliver it.
You’re focusing too much on the problems in your life
When you focus on the problems, challenges, hardships, and all that is ‘wrong’ or ‘missing’ in your life, you become a vibrational match for more problems. Remember, we attract a match for the vibe we are putting out there, so if you are focusing on all that is missing, you are giving your energy and attention to all that you do not have and will keep attracting more of what is missing. We cannot attract good by focusing on all that is bad, we cannot attract all that we want when we are focusing on all that we do not have. High vibe attracts high vibe and low vibe attracts low vibe.
The fix: Focus on all that is good in your life so that you can be a magnet for more of it. Give your energy, attention, thoughts behaviours and beliefs to all the experiences, things and people who make you feel good. Practicing gratitude is a powerful tool for this – what can you be grateful for in your life that is already there? Focus on that. Choose to focus on the possibilities and the great things you already have in your life over the problems, and you will become attractive AF to more good things!
You aren’t being precious with your energy
Your energy – the vibe that you put out into the world is your most powerful manifesting superpower. It single most important ingredient when it comes to manifesting your desires. The Universe will deliver us people, experiences and outcomes that match our vibrational frequency. So, if you are living in the feelings of guilt, shame, anger, pain, resenting, jealously, comparison and fear or surrounding yourself with people who make you feel crappy – you are going to attract more of that crappy! When you do not protect your energy and give it to the love vibe things, you attract low vibe things.
The fix: You have got to raise your vibe girl. You have got to choose feeling happy over feeling crappy! It is time to step into that higher version of you and focus your energy and attention to becoming the best version of you. Emitting those good vibes by getting good at feeling good and doing things that make you feel good.
Some great ways to raise and protect your vibe are:
- Surround yourself with high vibe people
- Using positive words and language
- Listen to your intuition
- Live in purpose, passion and do what you love
- Decontaminate your environment – (limit alcohol and toxic substances)
- Priorities hobbies and activities that make you fee good.
You aren’t trusting that it’s on its way
Did the universe hear me? Do I need to keep asking? Is it really coming? When? How long do I have to wait? Why hasn’t it come yet? Do I need to do anything else? Did I do it wrong?
These are very common questions when starting out, very common mistakes. Do you really believe that it is coming? Because if you don’t my love, it won’t. It can be super easy when starting out on your manifesting journey to get caught up in the ‘who what, when and how’ but this is slowing down your manifestations.
The fix: Trust trust and more trust. Trust that the universe heard you and that your desires are on their way. Trust that you don’t need to figure out the how or the when, you can let the universe do all of that. If you are following the principles outlined in my book, then your desires are on their way. I promise you. When you feel like your manifesting isn’t working and you have done the work, it might be as simple as it just isn’t your time yet. We can do all the practices to get us into alignment with what we want, but sometimes, we have just got to let go and know that the universe will send us when the time is right. Keep faith that it is coming, the universe heard you the first time!
You haven’t changed your thinking
Your thoughts play a HUGE role in what you manifest into this world. Why? Because they have a snowball effect on everything. Your thinking creates how you feel, which inspires how you behave, which in turn – creates your reality. It all starts with a thought and 90% of our thoughts are the same as the day before. So, if you are thinking negatively about yourself, or what you are deserving of having, then you are likely to feel negatively and take negative action, which guess what = negative results. If you want to start a business for example, but you don’t think you are capable, you are likely to feel pretty underconfident and scared, how does that then make you behave? Well, you likely take no action on your dream of starting a business because you are too scared it will fail. So how does your reality change – it doesn’t. It stays the same.
The fix: You must do the work on changing your thinking and belief system to knowing that you are capable, powerful worthy and deserving of what you want. Whatever it is that you want to manifest into your life, get clear on what your current thoughts and beliefs about having it and then look at how can you reframe them to more a more positive outlook? If you want to manifest more money, but you think it is impossible – it is going to be impossible. Change that thinking and choose the thought that earning more money is possible, it is easy and you are excited for it to come! That kind of thinking will bring you the ££!
You aren’t passing the tests you’re being sent
The speed in which you manifest the things you want, is largely determined by how well you are passing the tests being sent to you. Say what – tests?! Yep, you heard, tests. Usually, just as you get clear on what you want, a version of it walks in that is nearly but not quite, leaving you with the decision to make as to whether you take it, or not. Why? Well because the universe wants to see if you really meant what you said you want or if you are going to settle. Your test may look very similar to your desired manifestation yet missing a vital ingredient. If you settle because you worry there isn’t the real deal out there or this may be your only change and take what isn’t what you want, you aren’t going to get the real deal.
The fix: Get clear on what it is that you really want and then identify your negotiables and non-negotiables what are you willing to settle for and what aren’t you? You “pass” tests by responding to them in a state of high self-worth and NOT settling for anything less. Knowing that the real deal is on its way.
You are too attached to the outcome
How desperately do you want what you want? So much so that you are becoming a little obsessed or needy? Being too attached to an outcome is the surest way to ensure you do not get it. Desperation blocks manifestation. When you want something so badly, you are actually making it really clear that you are unhappy that you do not currently have it in your reality, whilst also, putting so much pressure on that ‘thing’ to complete you, fill or void or make you feel a certain way. This is lack thinking and lack attracts more lack! Nobody, not even your manifestations want neediness, nothing wants to be controlled or obsessed over, energetically, they feel restricted and will subconsciously, they will resist you.
The fix: Get clear on what you want then whole heartedly sit back with patience trusting that it is on its way! Ever wondered how the things you seem to want the least come the quickest? Or how when you just think of something then forget about it and it comes? That is because you got clear and then you let go and enjoyed the ride! Take away the conditions knowing that you can be happy, feel loved, looked after, safe or high vibe without your manifestations. If you wait for your manifestations to fill a void or make you feel a certain way you are giving all of your incredible power away. You and only you have the power to make you feel a certain way!
You aren’t letting yourself feel good
How often do you let yourself really feel good? Do you feel comfy feeling good? Do you think you are deserving of feeling good? Truth is, most of us want our manifestations because we want to feel good, right? But what if you knew you had to feel good first in order to get your manifestations? The saddest truth is the so many of us have let the version of us (I call her Self-sabotaging Susan) that likes us to feel crappy, lost, stuck and unhappy lead the way in life and therefore, put ourselves in a vibe to attract more things that make us feel that way!
The fix: Get comfy feeling good. Your ability to manifest all stems down to how good you are at feeling good and feeling all the things you want to feel from your manifestations right NOW! Write a list of all that you want to call into your life and then write how it will feel to have them. Then decide to focus on all in your life that makes you feel that way now and decide to feel it all now! You are worthy and deserving of feeling good – believe it! Visualisation is also a great tool for this – visualise where you want to be, or who you want to be but be sure to focus on how you feel in that visualisation. That is going to be what helps you attract more of that into your life!