Jobs that only exist because some humans are idiots

My friend is hired solely to go through everyone’s pictures on plenty of fish and delete all the dick and pussy pics.

That’s his job, literally looking at people’s bits all day. – u/ilikecocktails

I had a temp job in a posh department store a few years ago. The escalator going down from floor 2 to floor 1 had to be taken out to be replaced which took a month. Despite the many, many notices and the signs directing people to the lifts stairs, a member of staff had to stand at the top of the closed escalator just to direct the public to the lifts and stairs.

It broke peoples’ brains and it was worrying to see how many tried to get past the barriers, or got pissed and shouty because there was no escalator. Like holy shit how did people cope before moving stairs were invented. – u/thunderbirbthor

Traffic police in Baltimore.

I was there this summer and the gridlock was atrocious. People push their way into the intersection, the light turns red, and they are stuck there until the light is about to turn red in the opposite direction, at which point those people push their way into the intersection and the cycle perpetuates. During rush hour, they have police standing in the intersections–not to direct traffic, though, simply to hold their hand up when the light turns red so that people don’t push their way into the intersection. Basically, a human has to stand in traffic for hours JUST to tell the drivers what the lights mean. It was unbelievable. – u/Brocktoberfest


On crowded nights, Disney Springs has employees working at crosswalks at the intersections from the overflow parking lots to tell people when they can cross. They’re normal intersections that have lights telling you when you can cross. People just don’t acknowledge them and will try to run across oncoming traffic. – u/PhoneSteveGaveToTony

Gossip column journalists and paparazzi. – u/schaumann

My husband is a Labor and Employment attorney for a massive company and gives monthly seminars to everyone there to not send dick pics/sexually harass one another.

And like clockwork someone in that room does it within a couple weeks. – u/Brandy_Alexander

Met a guy once – his job was putting dirt on potatoes. Somebody along the supply chain washed them pretty well by the time they got to the grocery. People didn’t trust the clean potatoes. So one guy had to put dirt back on them to make them more authentic. – u/RealMcGonzo

Budgets are Sexy

Litter control personnel for public parks and beaches. – u/Back2Bach

‘m a self serve gas station attendant.

Honestly, the only reason i’m here is to slap the emergency stop button if someone starts pumping gas outside their car/gas can. Or if they smoke while pumping.

Oh, and shut off the pumps when I leave. – u/DrDragon13


Fortnite coaches – u/Hinksaw

Working on a film set is the worst. One time we had a road blocked off for a scene with a long fence barrier that said ‘No Entry’ on it. A lady stopped her car in front of it, got out and started moving it. When we sent one of the grips up to tell her the road was closed as we were filming, she was surprised. “Oh, that’s what this is for??? I didnt realize the road was closed!” – u/lovefeast

Televangelists. I hope I live to see the day people stop giving money to con men who buy McMansions and private jets and claim they deserve it because God loves them. – u/gets_that_reference

M first job out of college was to stand outside of Aldi’s and help the people how to figure out to put the quarter in the slot to release the shopping cart and then, later, how to put the chain back in to get their quarter back.

I said F-That. I stood there all day, baked out of my gord. – u/karmisson

The guys who install rubber padding around telephone and light poles so when we walk and text, we dont break our noses walking straight into them. – u/Wrest216

Safety manager here, a big portion of my job is saying stuff like “please don’t smoke near this flammable liquid” or other things most of us take for granted that people already know. – u/cleatus_the_noodle

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