07.05.2021

Eroticism instead of football

Women and men have different views on pornography, but sometimes they look at it together

A pretty clean-cleaner in a short skirt is diligently reaching for the highest regiments. The brutal master of the house does not strive for cleanliness and, having made sure that the underwear on the lady is missing, takes measures. Soon, a gardener would join the flushed pair, who came running to groans. Scenarios for pornographic movies are uncomplicated, the director has no goal to hit the viewer with the depth of thought: this is the fate of another movie. Here, one thing is important – to achieve a surge of blood to a certain organ, and in the shortest possible time. And the porn industry is successfully coping with this. How this process influences the intimate life of the viewer and his partner was dealt with by correspondents of SHE. 

Eroticism instead of footballSex “over the head”
Many women grimaced when they saw close-ups and heard loud cries of porn. However, there is an opinion that a normal healthy man, regardless of the presence of a permanent sexual partner, is simply obliged to some extent to be interested in women. It should attract both frank visual images, and unnatural orgasmic female moans. Psychologists explain this by wanting to experience a variety of sensations in life, including in the sexual sphere.

“If a man is responsible in marriage,” says psychologist consultant Anastasia Radaeva, “he wants to be faithful and does not want to side with something, but he wants something wild and animal, he deliberately chooses to sublimate this need through watching movies.” In addition, such sublimation can arise from fear of living relationships that contain wild passion and lust: “If the manifestation of wild behavior in sex is suppressed, it becomes easier to work out sex” over the head “by watching the film. Thus, it is possible to partially relieve sexual tension. ” 

Polygamy and feelings
Men and women have different attitudes to frank scenes. The first do not see anything reprehensible in this, explaining this by a natural call of nature or a desire to increase their knowledge of sex, improve, so to speak, professional skills. “Looking at pornography,” explains psychologist consultant Anastasia Radaeva, “they seem to be joining a man who directly performs intercourse, and thus satisfy the need for polygamous relations.”

Weak sex is more appreciated by movies, where nudity is covered up by some sort of experience, be it betrayal to a vile husband or a sudden flare-up between a student and a tulip seller. “A woman is primarily interested in a warm emotional attitude,” says Anastasia. “At their core they are closer to nature and often feel that there is no real erotic filling, real sensuality. They are much more exciting erotic film, where the sensual line is very bright than pornography, where purely mechanical actions abound. ” 

To catch unawares

A woman who discovered her boyfriend for watching porn can experience different emotions – from curiosity to anger. Based on the difference in the attitude towards the product of the porn industry, a woman often perceives such interests of a man as a sign of her insolvency. According to Anastasia Radaeva, irritation is possible if a woman complains about her sexuality: “If a woman has problems achieving orgasm, with knowledge of her body and her preferences, then, looking at the liberated woman, her postures and moans, she will compare herself with the heroine is not in her favor, will be constrained and annoyed. “

But is there any reason for unrest, if the husband preferred a cold screen with hot beauties of a warm bed with a cozy wife? It’s not worth worrying, says Elena Belova, a sexologist at the Avicenna medical center, if the relationship between the spouses remains confidential, and there are no negative changes in the family sex life. “Otherwise, it makes sense to talk about it, – Elena advises, – what is missing, what you want, how you like. Perhaps it turns out that there really is not enough novelty. Many couples do not do this and talk about everything except sex. And talking about such topics is 50% of the solution. ” If you have not noticed any serious changes in your intimate life, calm down and take care of yourself.

According to experts, the reason may be precisely because the woman has ceased to monitor herself – men often complain about it. 

Eroticism instead of footballNevertheless, any harmless interest can go into abuse. Unlike football, which causes arousal in men (albeit somewhat different), pornography can become a harmful habit or even an addiction. And then it will definitely be something to worry about. 

Together cheerfully to watch
More often the woman finds the man by surprise. On the contrary, it is rare – except that a man will offer him a company and add bright colors to the monophonic intimacy. Someone will agree, but someone will find this proposal offensive.

Psychologist Anastasia Radaeva explains the negative reaction by suppression of sexuality, which happened with the advent of Christianity. In pre-Christian Rus on the night of Ivan Kupala, all adult men and women undressed and played games where sexual contacts with different partners were common: “It helped to relieve the psyche, that night it was allowed to do things that can not be done during the year, unexplored. Therefore, a joint viewing of pornography can partially realize this desire. It seems that we stay together, but we look at other people, for their sex. “

At the same time, inept use of excitement tools can easily destroy conjugal intimate relationships. When working together, the same mechanisms work as for a single view. Frequent use of additional stimulants – and pornography, undoubtedly, it is – can lead to the fact that the body of the wife, studied along and across, excites less. 

The positive impact of pornography on relationships is possible only if the man is able to divide reality and illusion. 

“But if he does not feel confident and takes a porn film for a model of sexual relations, he does not understand that in reality this does not happen sooner, then he can start demanding the same behavior from the partner as in the film,” warns Anastasia Radaeva. 

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