The myth that today “there is nowhere to get acquainted” is as widespread as the installation of “men are decent now transferred”. In fact, situations and opportunities to get acquainted (and in the city of a million people, and even more so) every year becomes more and more.
The problem, according to psychologists, is that the girls of the XXI century, with external aggressiveness and activity, in matters of relations, want from men the behavior of the gallant age.
And you need, meanwhile, little: just do not be afraid to show initiative. And it is often to happen in successful places for dating.
1. Work, study
An obvious plus: there are always topics for conversation. “Here the main problem in acquaintance is solved – how to talk to another person, that is why work and study have been leaders for many years in terms of the number of romantic acquaintances,” admits Krasnoyarsk psychotherapist Andrei Zberovsky.
Less: from a new acquaintance you want new emotions and information, in the case of a relationship with a colleague there is a risk that your couple will have too much talk about what the boss said. In general, it can become boring. And sometimes it is harmful. Knowingly, for example, some companies prohibit romance in the workplace and even fire for it.
2. A company of friends
Plus: you do not run into a cat in a sack, people are all decent. “Here the reputation plays a big role, there is always someone to ask to characterize a person, and knowing the information, it’s always easier to decide to get acquainted”, says Andrei Zberovsky.
Less: sometimes the information is harmful. If a friend tells how many girls had a handsome man with brown eyes and why they broke up (and you probably ask him about it), maybe you will change your mind about getting acquainted.
3. Shopping and entertainment complexes
Surprisingly, but the fact: experts have allocated large shopping centers in the top three places for acquaintances.
This is a democratic place, both students and businessmen go to shops and movies. But the main thing is that they have allocated enough time for the campaign here. So, they do not rush anywhere.
Minus: there will be a lot of non-target audiences in the store, you will have to choose stores. In addition, the risk to run into a spouse who went to the cosmetics department is great.
4. Bars-clubs-restaurants
Plus: here people go specially, including to specially get acquainted. They have a lot of time, they are beautifully dressed, you can evaluate the social status and appearance. And alcohol makes bold even squeezed comrades.
Minus: most of the acquaintances in clubs are tied to the benefits of “lowland”, and a large application for sex and money, backed up with strong or not very alcohol, does not suit everyone.
5. The Internet
Pros: thousands of people are laid out, like an item in a supermarket, their willingness to communicate. Economical – time, money and strength (where else would you be able to talk with ten men at the same time? ). From the unobvious – an element of surprise, irrational.
“This is a variant of the lottery, in the technogenic world based on the calculation, the people’s need for irrationality remains. Who will come on a date, you do not know for sure, and it invigorates. You can get a prize that you will never get in real life, “-
director of the Center for Psychotherapy Dr. Alexander Butskikh prefers not to demonize online dating.
Cons: Obviously, the Internet has a lot of space for unstable personalities experiencing problems in reality. Many wishing intima on the first date. “Dating sites are often sites for sex, the likelihood of a relaxed communication and a pleasant acquaintance is much higher even in social networks, even more – on thematic forums,” Alexander Butskikh says that “non-special acquaintances” are more effective. So master the forum of anglers, hunters or cyclists. Perhaps you will find a lesson for a liking and get acquainted with a man.
6. Streets, stops, public transport
The simplest method has, like all simple, its advantages. You see people of different ages and social levels, this is the most democratic place to meet people. “If you want to get acquainted with officials – go around the mayor’s office or the administration,” Andrei Zberovsky exaggerates.
Less: haste. Usually people, especially in Siberia and in the winter, do not make a promenade on the streets, but go on business. Wrapped in coats, jackets and down jackets. To see something is difficult and there is no time. However, near the girls who asked for the purpose of dating, cars still stop. With men inside, naturally.
7. Sports and fitness
Places of increased concentrations of men – a gym or a stadium, for example, a climbing section or a biker gathering – that’s good. The main advantage is the common cause. It’s easy to ask for advice and help, but the opportunity to show oneself to skilful and strong men is like.
Minus: “This is the opposite of the Internet – the goods are visible to the person, but you do not know anything about it at all.
A dazzling hero with a beautiful body in the locker room turns into gopnik in “adidas” – shares observations Alexander Butskikh. In addition to gopnik, narcissistic narcissism can appear, also an option so-so.
Stadiums are good, but usually, according to men, they are busy with business – that is, they root for the team, and do not stare at single girls. However, the stadium in terms of dating is more promising than macrame courses.
8. Advanced training courses, psycho-training
If everything is clear about the courses of macrame, then there is hope for driving, web design, psychology, English, finally. However, experts are adamant. “The world is feminized, women are exploring new directions. As a result, today in any courses, whatever the specialty, some girls are sitting, “- sums up Andrei Zberovsky.
As psychologists say, a “valuable” man is more likely to meet in courses where an advanced level of professional disciplines is studied, something like professional English for lawyers. But psycho-training with the slogan “improve vitality” usually attract, to put it mildly, personalities inadequate.
9. Trains and airplanes, travel
To get acquainted on suitcases is a great option, and that’s why. The person before any trip starts to worry (even if the journey takes three hours), and the excitement is due to the fact that he “falls out” of the usual life. This is on hand for dating – we are ready in advance for an unexpected adventure. That’s why it’s so easy to talk with strangers on the road.
Less: it’s not a fact that your paths will cross in the future. Getting acquainted with the person in the terminal, it is extremely difficult to foresee whether he lives in your city at least. But from a pleasant communication in advance to refuse it is not necessary precisely.
